Oh my gosh, how much time has flown by since i last wrote? Many many months. i got lost in the worry of finances, hustling to doctor appointments, and struggling to make ends meet. Syr and i had been in a pseudo-vanilla holding pattern as We both struggled with different aliments that seemed to come out of the blue.
Syr has been struggling with chronic migraines for well over a year. They have affected Her every day living, and sadly have affected our quality of life. If She is not bunched up in bed with Her head to the wall, She is asleep on the couch since that makes the headaches go away. When She cannot get in for a nerve blocker at our neurologist, She is unable to do much of anything, that including sex, or going for walks, two of Our favorite things to do.
So in turn, we have been laying low at home for months with the shades drawn. She restless and in pain, me worried and frustrated. If not for our friends coming by to hang out here and there, i think i would go insane.
And that makes me feel bad. i hate getting frustrated with Syr. She knows Her health problems are what have held us back from a lot. And i know it makes Her frustrated and sad also. So when i get short and snappy, it does no good for either one of Us.
i have been having better days; as of late, i find myself throwing myself into daily household work and chores with zest, knowing it's not Syr's cup of tea. i find myself less and less resentful She does not think to offer to help, especially since She told me She knows i find comfort in this type of service. And when i think about it, i do enjoy what i do to make our house a home. Since coming to a great point in my sobriety and my personal mind set, i am finding i feel ready to start exploring more of my submissive side again. Syr has been so very patient with me, and in turn i have not been able to walk away from our BDSM path. i may not be able to take the corporal play as i once did, but now We realize that even four or five beltings will bond us as 45 minutes of it used to.
There are days i will right on top of everything that Syr needs for the day, where appointments are, and making sure Her drinks are poured, and She has what She needs. And then there will be days i can't get it together for love or money. And that is all ok. i am a work in progress, i have a whole lifetime to get things down right. i have a Dominant who loves me, for everything i try to do for Her, and everything i strive to be is just right for the both of us. With this in mind, i think i am happily coming to a new chapter in the book of Our life together, and learning about the sweet submissive within me.
Syr has been struggling with chronic migraines for well over a year. They have affected Her every day living, and sadly have affected our quality of life. If She is not bunched up in bed with Her head to the wall, She is asleep on the couch since that makes the headaches go away. When She cannot get in for a nerve blocker at our neurologist, She is unable to do much of anything, that including sex, or going for walks, two of Our favorite things to do.
So in turn, we have been laying low at home for months with the shades drawn. She restless and in pain, me worried and frustrated. If not for our friends coming by to hang out here and there, i think i would go insane.
And that makes me feel bad. i hate getting frustrated with Syr. She knows Her health problems are what have held us back from a lot. And i know it makes Her frustrated and sad also. So when i get short and snappy, it does no good for either one of Us.
i have been having better days; as of late, i find myself throwing myself into daily household work and chores with zest, knowing it's not Syr's cup of tea. i find myself less and less resentful She does not think to offer to help, especially since She told me She knows i find comfort in this type of service. And when i think about it, i do enjoy what i do to make our house a home. Since coming to a great point in my sobriety and my personal mind set, i am finding i feel ready to start exploring more of my submissive side again. Syr has been so very patient with me, and in turn i have not been able to walk away from our BDSM path. i may not be able to take the corporal play as i once did, but now We realize that even four or five beltings will bond us as 45 minutes of it used to.
There are days i will right on top of everything that Syr needs for the day, where appointments are, and making sure Her drinks are poured, and She has what She needs. And then there will be days i can't get it together for love or money. And that is all ok. i am a work in progress, i have a whole lifetime to get things down right. i have a Dominant who loves me, for everything i try to do for Her, and everything i strive to be is just right for the both of us. With this in mind, i think i am happily coming to a new chapter in the book of Our life together, and learning about the sweet submissive within me.
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